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this is something that i got from another forum ,it's a continuing online story;). where everyone adds there little bit to keep it story going .you will get a few laughs out of it,as the story could go anywhere.:o
i will start it off..
it all began, whilst backing the troopy up for it's next big adventure. this was a trip everyone, had been waiting over a year for.
there was to be a long drive ahead of us,but for the chance to hunt......
it all began, whilst backing the troopy up for it's next big adventure. this was a trip everyone, had been waiting over a year for.
there was to be a long drive ahead of us,but for the chance to hunt......
Whether it be rabbits in the ridges, or Sambar in the valleys,
We were definetly looking forward to dropping some game in the near future.
grimmobow
11-05-08, 09:11 PM
except first we had to fix howie's truck where the wild stalions of bathurst had taken their toll on his vehicle,so 10mins later we were away
[-------------Correcting to make story flow better since Grimmo didn't post it as a whole story----------]
it all began, whilst backing the troopy up for it's next big adventure. this was a trip everyone, had been waiting over a year for.
there was to be a long drive ahead of us,but for the chance to hunt......
Whether it be rabbits in the ridges, or Sambar in the valleys,
We were definetly looking forward to dropping some game in the near future.
except first we had to fix howie's truck where the wild stalions of bathurst had taken their toll on his vehicle,so 10mins later we were away
Neix, you don't repost it every time as a whole story, just ad your bit in as the next post.
Sorry to interrupt the flow here. :rolleyes:
bowhunting4eva
11-05-08, 10:55 PM
After driving for 3 hours we finally reached the outskirts of bathurst due to heavy traffic and a car accident
Whilst howie was still complaining about thos darn stalions that made love to the patrol we were talking our selfs up about landing some BIG game...
It was then that we realised that we had inadvertently driven through a vortex and slipped into a parallel dimension.
Fortunately this dimension was tollerant of Howies highly reflective mellon and contained many weird and wonderful variations of game animals such as the extremely dangerous.........
XTfreak
12-05-08, 09:01 AM
buffafallow deer...
Antarcher
12-05-08, 09:11 AM
and the scandanavian trotting duck. A fearsome horse bodied duck billed and webbed footed, crow pecking vermin ridden by none other than Pigman. And don't forget the Rabbats, evil fanged rabbit like creatures with bat wings that lauch at your throat with gay abandon.
Trophy Bowhunts
12-05-08, 09:38 AM
We finally reached our first stop on our fantasy trip when Howie realised his dreams may come true and find one of those elusive Buffafallow. As they slipped into a deep and excited sleep their journey was now well and truly becoming a reality.
The next morning....
XTfreak
12-05-08, 12:28 PM
they awoke to glass all over the ground around the ute.
And there in the middle of the mess stood a...
Bill
... stood a 3 foot tall half man half...........
Half man half Guinea pig, realising that Troy must have hunted this area before they pushed on into the mist filled valley rumoured to hold good numbers of the elusive and highly dangerous buffafallow.
So after what seemed like hours and with the tips given to them from the half man half Guinea pig. Their minds began to fill with thoughts of..........
Blakey_boi
12-05-08, 04:38 PM
weather or not the buffafallow would taste like chicken.
bowhunting4eva
12-05-08, 04:42 PM
after deciding the buffafallow would taste like horse they decided to move on and hunt....
the next gully system.upon cresting the last saddle, they set up to start glassing.within the first 5mins, Howie turns to Troy and says "have alook in that small clear patch on the right,i think we might have found our poaching mates from last year".Troy replies "yeh, thats looks a lot like......
bobzila
12-05-08, 07:19 PM
owe old mate Poacher Pete lets go and ...
XTfreak
12-05-08, 07:30 PM
sift through the bones to be sure it is him...
and after identifying the remains by the presence of spent shells all over the place, they continued on their fantasy bowhunting adventure
while thinking where am i??? and where is wally?
Next on the list was the very wiley kangawallafox, a fox that jumped around on its back legs, stood six feet tall, but was mainly hunted for its trophey class ball bag, so Howie could use it for a wig LOL.
but the elite bowhunter would first have to visit Howie to obtain some kangawallafox busters or KB's for short
lemmiwinks
12-05-08, 09:50 PM
Half time interlude Umm three things, hallucinogenic drugs are still obviously widely available and I,m so glad I still have some hair left and is anything going to get shot or slept with or anything??? Stop keeping me in suspenders..
In exchange for a few VB's( victoria bitters)
they proceeded on, after a long and amusing talk about where to go next,they evnetualy decided that, they would hunt the Kangawallafox. as Howie needed a new rug and if a buffafallow came there way, Howie could get 2 mounts done for the price of 1.
just then the UHF came to life, it was the 2nd hunting party!, that they had been waiting for.
Bowfly's voice came through, that he had arrived with.........
Luke in a fully decked out Rickshaw drawn by a 90 yearold chinaman in fluro pyjamas. Howie quickly commented that their inappropriately short kilts though not in camo and rather revealing where truley the hieght of fashion.....
Bowfly smiled at Luke knowing all the while the other guys were just itching to have a go at wearing such a fasionable item direct from the latest designer stores in China... Just as the 90 year old Chinese dude sreamed "look up on the ridge!" as he dropped the rickshaw and bolted into the bush behind them with fear in his eyes and at a pace that they were sure he was never to be seen again. Luke grabbed his bow and...
headed up to the ridge with the dark silouette still in sight...........
hunt or be hunted
13-05-08, 08:24 PM
an hour or so passed and Luke finally made it to the ridgeline. his arms and legs were aching from the long and painful climb to the top, so he sat down for a rest. he accidently fell asleep but woke to the sounds of bones being crushed and loud breathing not 20metres from him. he very quietly nocks an arrow tipped with a trusty Blackstump broadhead and stalks his way over to the source of sound. he gets to some boulders, the beast is on the otherside unaware of Lukes presence, he draws back and slowly stands on top of the closest big rock and peers down onto...
grimmobow
13-05-08, 09:36 PM
a yowie eating a black panther...
Antarcher
14-05-08, 07:52 AM
In penrith of all places
XTfreak
14-05-08, 09:07 AM
Luke cannot believe his eyes, he is so scared he can not move and he thinks to himself...
DavidJHardy
14-05-08, 10:05 AM
oh my goodness this isn't my bow this is my sons bow i must of picked up the wrong one when i left cos this is a 8lbs toy compound, it can never penetrate a yowie...
XTfreak
14-05-08, 12:11 PM
as though the Yowie heard Lukes thooughts it turned to face Luke with what appeared to be grin on its face and...
DavidJHardy
14-05-08, 12:19 PM
luke lay low under the boulder and at that moment an arrow wizzed over his head from a little banjo playing Mexican who also happened to be hunting the same spot...
who was apparently contracted to kill trouble yowies in this area and had been hunting this particular one for 2 months..............
well, the bango playing mexican's arrow flew true, covering the short distance inseconds, and hitting the yowie tight behind the shoulder, dropping it in a instance.
Luke could not believe his eyes , as to what had just taken place.So as Luke and his 90 year old rickshaw runner walked over to the fallen beast,the banjo playing mexican came along side him,and lifted his somberowe,to reveal a face he know to well........
DavidJHardy
14-05-08, 10:37 PM
as ace venyura...
"Nee How Ace old mate", said Luke.
"what's a detective like you, doing in a place like this?" "How they hanging cobba?" (Luke said as he appreciated the gentle breeze drifting up his short kilt).
"Well" said Ace "I.....
(bloody unreal what you miss when you don't read a thread for a few days isn't it!) LOL
belegstrongbow
14-05-08, 11:46 PM
....am here to inform you that this is just a dream and you need to wake up and go to work before it's too late. Luke breathed a sigh of relief, and said "I knew this was too weird, thanks mate."
"No worries" said Ace, and he skipped off with the dead yowie, the panther and all the other strange beings singing "Row, row, row your boat."
Luke woke up to his radio alarm clock playing a song from band which supports PETA (hence the nightmare) and uttered...
Antarcher
15-05-08, 06:09 AM
man that mexican got some speed out of that banjo bow, I think I will make one and be the first snaggletooth, banjo plucker that can shoot arrows from the fourth string whilst watching deliverance and playing duelling banjoes at the same time. Man those aussie panthers better look out. Look out for the new range of Banjbowtech coming your way.
While day-dreaming about his favorite "squeal like a pig" scene from the movie, he heard a tapping at the window. Drawing back the curtains revealed.........
a MUTATED AGITATED SEA BASS WITH A LASER BEAM ON IT's HEAD! :o
DavidJHardy
15-05-08, 09:32 AM
it was pete the poacher's ghost
Who said "Snap out of it sunshine, now REALLY wake up and get back to your counselling session... you've fallen asleep on the couch dopey!".
So, Luke sat up and said - "thanks Doc, I think I just need to go hunting livin' in Shangers has done my head in!"
He raced home packed his gear and...
made the last minute check in phone call to the property, with the owner telling him how the roar was well underway!!! and he had seen two cracka heads on the ridge last night...
Antarcher
15-05-08, 11:03 AM
Both heads were on the same body, now this is definitely snaggletooth country.
DavidJHardy
15-05-08, 11:09 AM
and by 8 that morning they were on there way. the two hour trip to the property went in an instance...
grimmobow
15-05-08, 11:39 AM
due to the fact the boys had acces to a working vintage time travelling machine made up of a phone box and several old h.q. rims plus 2 rolls of aluminium foil......
aussie.rum.pig
15-05-08, 01:33 PM
and a carton of op rum
and 13 conies all in a little wheel going as fast as they can.
They departed the time machine to be greeted by....
DavidJHardy
15-05-08, 03:26 PM
old mate...
Garden Gnome!
15-05-08, 04:32 PM
who went by the name of Garden Gnome! with greatings along the lines of....
aussie.rum.pig
15-05-08, 05:21 PM
and hey b!tch .................... and hey mate want a op
"By the way saw some daaaaandy looking fallow the other day feeding by the hay shed. They had pink bows and all, no bucks with em though, but fine looking bits of flesh none the less." You up for a bit of.....
Garden Gnome!
16-05-08, 09:42 AM
Kilt sniffin fallocat arra slingin dandylion muscle hugin........
It was then that Clemo swooped in, riding his highly modified peddle powered Mathews Dren, complete with 20" polished cams/wheels, spokey dokey's, handle bar steamers and wicker basket.
He jumped of and announced, " You have illegally entered my hunting spot and for that you must pay, I shall rain Black Stumps down upon you".
He then whipped out an arrow from his quiver. Attached to the end of it was a rather large somewhat charred tree stump.
Garden gnome laughed and pointed at the ridiculous looking attachment on the end of the arrow, "That’s not a Black Stump broad head" he said, "that’s an actual black stump.
"SILENCE INFIDEL". Clemo yelled, "The guy I bought it of on Ebay assures me it is a genuine Black Stump. Now prepare to meat your maker" he said as he drew his Bow/Bike complete with tree stump broad head and took aim.........
DavidJHardy
16-05-08, 03:00 PM
and fired...
Garden Gnome!
16-05-08, 03:22 PM
his rather large tree stump broadhead into the air, when they reached there peak and turned toward the ground they splintered into Outback Supreme's with a wicked sound screaming from them, the Garden gnome! casually strolled over to the highly modified peddle powered Mathews Dren, complete with 20" polished cams/wheels, spokey dokey's, handle bar steamers and wicker basket carrying R-licence holder and attached himself to Clem's leg then look up at him saying........
"are you my Dad?mum said that, i was a love child from the 70's......
bear beau
16-05-08, 05:45 PM
And clemo replied "certainly not! after years of riding around on my pimped out dren, the vibrations from the 20 inch rims have had an adverse affect on my oat sowing apparatus therefore"....
...I had a chance to create a child....But wait, there was that one night, after to many OP's at the Windsor Castle, its coming back to me.
Yes, search your feeling Garden Gnome, you know it to be true.
I AM YOUR FATHER!
"NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" screams Garden Gnome.
Yes, join me and together we will rule this hunting spot as Father and Son.
NEVERRRR!!!
Then You Shall DIE!!
As Clemo raised his Bow/Bike again...........
he started to question himself ,"how did i conceive a ceramic son........
Of course!!! it must of been them magic mushrooms and other wacked out hippy drugs from the 70's...........
Suddenly the wail of sirens cut through the morning air and 2 large men in white coats collected the pair of highly medicated camo clad individuals and tossed them into the back of their van speeding off leaving Luke and the mexican scratching their heads in a cloud of dust. Luke turned to the mexican with a slight smile on his face, possibly from the breeze that passed under his kilt from the departing van and............
grimmobow
16-05-08, 10:24 PM
gave him a great big kiss."I knew that clemo was a crazy S.O.B. let us continue our journey into the approaching darkness and make our way to the hallowed land of the samoose, half samba half moose".these majestic creatures live only in an uncharted area of .....
DavidJHardy
16-05-08, 10:43 PM
nobody know cos its uncharted...
Antarcher
17-05-08, 05:10 AM
Suddenly out out of the darkness a fine beam traces the chest area of the mexican's camo. All goes quiet and a hushed chuckle comes from the darkness. Right then the little (little, but not as little as Luke anyway) mexican whispers "Holy frijoles, it is old slew eye with his night vision, laser beamed bow and blunt broadheads. How unethical can one man get. We better get out of here"
Obviously the mexican knows the threat from his arch nemesis and doesn't want a bar of it. They run and an arrow just skims the brim of his hat as he ducks and bounds off in a very deer like fashion.
"Man that was close", exclaimed Luke. "What's with the blunt broadheads thing Pedro?"(yes little mexman has a name)
His saying goes, "I keep my broadheads blunt, so I can muscle em on through, I don't want a clean pass through and let them die like they never knew. I aim to miss cause I just might hit something and when I finally do, they will definitely know that that blunt broadhead came from the bow of old man slew."
"Holy hell" said Luke, "that is one unethical man, can I ban him, where did he come from?"
"He came out of the bayou many years back, he has an eye that barely opens and only 3 and a half teeth. I think my banjo playing drew him here and now we are cursed. Please do you know anyone who can save us Luke?"
"Just wait, I am about to beam someone up. It's...
DavidJHardy
17-05-08, 09:42 AM
legolas...
who had bought along with him......
Antarcher
18-05-08, 06:40 AM
Legless, the OP Rum swigging, toe bow shooting halfwit. He is the only person old slew is afraid of. He can sling 1 inch groups at a hundred meters from his nifty little self bow he made out of donkey shins. Better still, he shoots with his feet as he is always passed out drunk and only ever gets up to take a swig. The rest of the time Legolas guides him around on a little apple cart, taking him to all the prime hunting and drinking spots.
MMMM Legolas you say! Now I am confused> does this man have another name upon the the Ausy Alter. Ah yes its coming back, from depths that I despair, I do believe without a doubt it is the Spanish Pointer.
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